Sunday 10 January 2010

Aussie Rules


Traditionally, it has been the Conservative Party which has cast an eye to matters Australian for inspiration at election time. Lynton Crosby, master strategist and good buddy to old PM John Howard, has been summoned from Down Under more than once to advise Tories about campaigning.

Senior Labour figures have been looking even further back into the Antipodean past, pondering how the ‘Mighty’ Bob Hawke (pictured) managed to win three landslides for Labour in the 1980s. However it is not the official election strategists who are looking for lessons to learn but the arch anti-Brown plotters.

Bob Hawke gained the leadership for Labour in February 1982 just a month before the General Election where he thumped the incumbent Malcolm Fraser with his superior communications skills, known locally as being a “bloody good bloke”. The rejuvenation of the party following the very late defenestration of the dullard Bill Hayden is preying on minds of key Brown haters such as Charles Clarke.

It was all too much for Geoff ‘Mogadon’ Hoon and Patricia ‘Pat’ Hewitt this week when they issued a letter on Wednesday inviting MPs to get in a huddle and count the number of dissenters. It would not be hard to find 100 if they could be persuaded to be honest for a moment; that would have been enough to maim Brown’s premiership.

But they figured without the constitution of the party which requires a drawn out contest and a special conference. Only Brown’s resignation could kick start a quick election. Hardly a likely prospect from this Great Political Limpet.

There was one other fundamental difference: Hawke was stratospherically ahead of all other candidates; whereas Labour has no outstanding alternative. Hawke’s appeal was multi-layered, he was a good knockabout Parliamentarian and moderate ex-union leader aligning him perfectly with the central tenet of Aussie philosophy – every bloke (and Sheila) "deserves a fair go.” His electoral hopes were hugely enhanced by the revelation he briefly held the world record for sinking a yard of ale. Let’s face it, three pints of ice-cold lager in eleven seconds is really going some for any cobber.

And there’s no doubt that accolade gave him more cred with the public than David Milliband ever could with his banana.

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